Christine sat
on the edge
of her bed
her white
dressing gown
wrapped about her
her hair unbrushed
she swung her legs
back and forth
like a child waiting
to play games
you sat
on the bed opposite
your borrowed
dressing gown
dark blue
you held tight
with your hands
as the nurses
had taken away
your belt and laces
in the locked ward
when I first had ECT
she said
they took me in that room
back there and laid me
on that black couch
and said it won’t hurt
it will help
she looked at you
her eyes focused
making sure
you were listening
she brushed hair
out of her face
it’s like being a virgin
before sex
you don’t know
what to expect
she added
her voice quieter
she looked around
at the ward
others were elsewhere
or in their beds
or taking a shower
and that bit
when they put
the electrodes
each side of your head
and put that thing
to bite on
yes
you said
made me feel like
I was in a dentist’s chair
back as a kid
with the smell of gas
only there isn’t gas
no gas
she said interrupting
that’s right
just feels like it
she took a deep intake
of breath
you watched her
her fingers held
the dressing gown
to her neck
the ring on her finger
she wouldn’t remove
even if the guy
didn’t show
for the wedding
she’d keep the ring
stuck there
like waiting to die
you said
and then they give you
the injection in the hand
a little prick
and the wave of nothingness
sweeps over you
and you blank out
and it’s all dark
and empty
she nodded her head
her eyes still glued
to you
then you wake
with a headache
like a huge hangover
without the booze
she said
looking away from you
her profile adding
to her beauty
and it didn’t work for me
she added
as a nurse went by
carrying blankets
me neither
you said
just the dreaded numbness
and the busted head
she got off the bed
and walked to the window
and you followed
standing beside her
looking out
at the trees
and fields
covered in snow
a tractor across the way
with gulls and rooks
following behind
and she touched
your hand with hers
the blind
leading the blind.
Christine sat
on the edge
of her bed
her white
dressing gown
wrapped about her
her hair unbrushed
she swung her legs
back and forth
like a child waiting
to play games
you sat
on the bed opposite
your borrowed
dressing gown
dark blue
you held tight
with your hands
as the nurses
had taken away
your belt and laces
in the locked ward
when I first had ECT
she said
they took me in that room
back there and laid me
on that black couch
and said it won’t hurt
it will help
she looked at you
her eyes focused
making sure
you were listening
she brushed hair
out of her face
it’s like being a virgin
before sex
you don’t know
what to expect
she added
her voice quieter
she looked around
at the ward
others were elsewhere
or in their beds
or taking a shower
and that bit
when they put
the electrodes
each side of your head
and put that thing
to bite on
yes
you said
made me feel like
I was in a dentist’s chair
back as a kid
with the smell of gas
only there isn’t gas
no gas
she said interrupting
that’s right
just feels like it
she took a deep intake
of breath
you watched her
her fingers held
the dressing gown
to her neck
the ring on her finger
she wouldn’t remove
even if the guy
didn’t show
for the wedding
she’d keep the ring
stuck there
like waiting to die
you said
and then they give you
the injection in the hand
a little prick
and the wave of nothingness
sweeps over you
and you blank out
and it’s all dark
and empty
she nodded her head
her eyes still glued
to you
then you wake
with a headache
like a huge hangover
without the booze
she said
looking away from you
her profile adding
to her beauty
and it didn’t work for me
she added
as a nurse went by
carrying blankets
me neither
you said
just the dreaded numbness
and the busted head
she got off the bed
and walked to the window
and you followed
standing beside her
looking out
at the trees
and fields
covered in snow
a tractor across the way
with gulls and rooks
following behind
and she touched
your hand with hers
the blind
leading the blind.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem