David DeSantis

Rookie (01/29/85 / Utica, NY)

** Breakups Poem by David DeSantis

We wake up slowly,
shaded by romance.
she looks like a film,
that I am lucky to attend.

I look at her softly,
My hands warmth as touch,
And like a masseuse without training
I trace her neck line crest.

Her eyes catch mine for a moment
And in them I hear acceptance,
Two of a kind
Or one and one
We make a pair together.

Nothing new or special,
Or out of the ordinary.
And I’m sure I forgot the moment
As quickly as it came.

To wake up slowly,
Next to beauty
Is now much harder
To forget.

Copyright (c) David DeSantis

Submitted: Tuesday, October 07, 2008
Edited: Monday, February 16, 2009

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Comments about this poem (** Breakups by David DeSantis )

  • Rookie Elizabeth Sheaffer (6/2/2009 9:54:00 AM)

    Wow... Your expression of your innermost feelings is amazing. Most people could not put emotion to words in the way you have done here. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 3 Points Original Unknown Girl (3/13/2009 5:58:00 AM)

    So beautiful, wistful and full of the sentiments of your heart. Love it. HG: -) xx (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Asia Joseph (1/7/2009 8:30:00 AM)

    Woe real sweet and gentle its as if i'm there! ! ! ! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Rebel Heart (11/9/2008 12:06:00 PM)

    The gentle, reflective tone captures the poignant beauty of this lost love...a detailed and delicately penned poem in which the words are clearly weighted with a sense of inevitable regret. j x (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 72 Points Kesav Easwaran (10/12/2008 1:40:00 AM)

    The last stanza lines break the reader heart...love, once a flowering spring, now a raining winter, wet in these soaring lines...poignant write, David 10 (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 3 Points Original Unknown Girl (10/9/2008 11:51:00 AM)

    David, your pen is ablaze with sensitivity and poignancy springs from every word inked. This is especially fine, so touching and yet it weighs heavy on my heart. Why is it that we can only pen like this when we are in pain from the remembrance of a lost love? Just beautiful. HG: -) xx (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Anita Atina (10/9/2008 5:04:00 AM)

    Wonderfully sensitive and poignant David, well done! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 12 Points Onelia Avelar (10/7/2008 1:32:00 PM)

    I like it, it is a magic piece it seems as if everything is under control and you analyze the situation sober minded in the morning as usual, but this time something escapes your mind. At least this is the effect. The poem is very good structured and well penned. I hope to read more often your poems, shaded by romance. Best wishes, one (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Shimon Weinroth (10/7/2008 10:58:00 AM)

    well done ' parting is such sweet sorrows' Romeo and Juliet (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Tia Maria (10/7/2008 9:08:00 AM)

    So wonderfully written - that's a ten for sure... (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 395 Points Ency Bearis (10/7/2008 9:08:00 AM)

    a nice reflection of those sweet things and still linger after breakup..nicely narrated/write..A 10 4 this...

    Ency Bearis (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 291 Points Marilyn Lott (10/7/2008 8:53:00 AM)

    A beautiful romantic setting laced with sweet thoughts. Very nice! A '10! ' from me as well.

    Best Wishes,
    Marilyn (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Lynda Robson (10/7/2008 8:40:00 AM)

    Some things stay in our memories, an excellent poem David, well woven, thanks
    Lynda xx (Report) Reply

Read all 13 comments »

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