Broken Hearts Part 1 Poem by justice ortiz

Why is this so hard
I know you are only friends
But, what you said has me scarred.
That was your only message,
And it sends.
Over and over again
It plays through my mind
'Yeah I would do her'
It's stuck in my head,
Like its intertwined.
Why am I hanging out with the both of you?
It brings me down
Because picturing you too,
Brings upon a frown.
I don't know what to do.
Jealousy, I'm guilty of it
But, I don't want to quit.
I hurt him one too many times,
I can't split.
Scared of you sleeping in her bed,
One too many times my years have shed.
I guess I deserve it though
But, it hurts so bad,
That It can't show.
'Go suck one,
It's what you're good at'
I'm in tears, shock
Why would I want a guy like that?
Why would you want a girl like me?
A sneak
I'm mean.
Mistreat you
Hurt you
When you're on your knees
Begging for me to stop
When I should be saying 'I'm sorry baby'.
I'm not good enough for you,
Maybe she is,
But when fractured hearts are in pieces,
There's nothing else to do,
They are unfixable creases.