Robert Hall

(August 28,1993 / Indiana)

Depressed


When you’re sad,
When you’re blue,
About something old,
About something new.

Not a boo-boo,
Or a bad name,
Something continues,
Something hard to tame.

It's when you’re sad,
for a big huge thing,
It's when you’re sad,
For a long broken fling.

For a lost loved one,
Or a big huge fight,
Or when when love,
Is never in sight.

Submitted: Monday, April 04, 2005
Edited: Wednesday, May 18, 2005

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  • Roseanne Huckleberry (5/11/2005 9:10:00 PM)

    Robert,
    I had no idea that you liked to write. I had a notebook of poems when I was your age. I guess it was a way to write about my feelings. I really like the way you write. Your verses are short, but they manage to say a lot. Most of them seem a little bit sad, but I can tell that you would probably be good at humorous poetry, too! Don't worry too much about rhyming your last word. Some famous poets don't rhyme at all. You can say much more if you don't get too hung up on finding words that rhyme. I still remember how well you rollerbladed with Sarah at the park that time. I bet you could come up with a great poem about skating, or combine it with the thrill of running, skating, soccer and more.
    Anyway, I think you have real talent - and on top of that we share a birthday and the same initials! ! ! ! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Michael Shepherd (4/4/2005 11:00:00 AM)

    I'd recommend not finishing a poem with a negative - negatives don't leave a clear picture in the reader's mind.
    But depression is a big theme - good for you for having a go. (Report) Reply

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