Jayne Davies

(5th October 1960 / Abercynon, Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Disaster In The Kitchen


I've never been good in the kitchen,
My pancakes end up on the mat,
For I'm no Fanny Craddock,
Or Mrs Kipling come to that!

You can tap your shoes with my pastry,
And I can't get my cakes to rise.
Poor Mrs Beeton would turn in her grave
At the state of my apple pies!

My culinary skills are appalling!
It's simple, I just can't cook.
As far as kitchen disasters go,
I could write an award winning book.

If I got a job in a kitchen,
I'd end up getting the sack!
Whoever invented the Microwave Meal,
Deserves a big pat on the back.

Submitted: Friday, February 01, 2013

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Poet's Notes about The Poem

A true reflection of my own kitchen experiences!

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