Even In Pain Am Still Grateful Poem by Heyjirol Javier

My body is broken but not from inside,
The scream within I always try to hide.
Struggling on to prevent people knowing
That I have a pain that's not always showing.
Popping pills and injections everyday (sore butts)
Being on sick bed isn't fun, had to make the best outta a bad situation
Turning every pain into words
It's hard to keep the blues away.
Life experiences; I'm scared to lose
But fatigued and drained I cannot move.
Heading into a black abyss,
What will this pain make me miss?
The future uncertain; downhill every day
It can't always be this way

I want to run a thousand miles,
I want to bend down to pick up sketch pad
I want lay my bed
I want walk in the scorching sun
I want to dance in the rain
I want to feel the earth beneath my feet
I want to cook until I break out a sweat
I want to bath and cream my back
I want to laugh out loud
I want no-restriction
I want to be normal again
I want to be ME

I should stay calm
I should ignore what my body cries
I should stay positive until it dies(pain)
If I do not, No help at all; will I ever know,

Never under estimate the freedom of living and enjoying the show of good health
Just a little brief in this excruciating pain
And my smiles to friends I'll no longer feign.
A never ending constant of back aches, stomach rumble, and pelvis kicks

My Family, My Friends! Your support is what makes me long for life and alive I am.