Guilt Felt! Accompanied By Regret Poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar

If I had not taken chances,
To adventure and explore...
This life to know it as mine,
I would find excuses to make...
For misdeeds intended.
To claim mistakes made.
As alibis to use in my defense.
Living to adventure.
And explore life.
Somehow...
Makes admitting wrongs to do,
To others...
Something to say.
To let the chips,
Fall where they may.
And oddly enough,
Relationships strengthen.
When pretentions...
Are unloaded off backs!

Unlike so many others today.
Addressing,
Their steady habits...
Of impressions to make.
Hoping the guilt they feel,
To have done to do...
Something they know wrong.
With a backstabbing to lie.
On others to use, accuse...
And deceive.
Will go forgotten.
Or better yet...forgiven!

But guilt to feel,
Is a self inflicting enemy.
Accompanied by regret.
And stays.
If not admitted,
At least to oneself.
Will by others be noticed.
Guilt twitches,
And beats around the bush.
Even after the effects,
Of a prescribed medication...
Has kept a forced smile,
Plastered as if...
Painted on one's face.
Hoping...
Their wide unblinking eyes,
Do not give away...
The remaining remnants,
Of a guilt they still feel felt...
To someone who suspects,
Another is doing their best...
To either ask for help.
Or directions to the nearest,
Restroom!

'Should I remember you,
From somewhere?
Or are you wishing your smile,
Could appear more natural?
Is there something wrong?
Are you going through,
Some kind of...
Detoxification? '