Have You Ever? (My First Poem) Poem by Carla Nestoros

Have you ever held back tears so hard
It makes you choke?
Have you ever held onto something so tight
Eventually it broke?

Have you ever cried so much
You can't feel each tear?
Have you been scared to turn off your music
Because of what you'll hear?

Have you ever not wanted to wipe your eyes
Because then you'll see?
Have you ever not wanted to wake up
Because that's reality?

Have you ever mumbled one thing
That just fills you with pain?
Have you ever wondered what went wrong
And rethink life again?

Have you ever been so close to ending it
The knifes pressed against your wrist?
Have you ever wondered how they'd cope
If you didn't exist?

Have you ever held a picture
And just wished you were there?
Have you ever seen someone crying
And just need to stare?

Have you ever lied to someone
When you say that you're alright?
Have you ever laid on your bed
And held your pillow tight?

Have you ever looked through your phonebook
Just incase you want to tell?
Have you ever decided that earth
Can't be too different to hell?

Have you ever missed someone so much
You just can't face life?
Have you ever felt a little twisted
Staring at a knife?

Have you ever hated someone so much
You can't get out of bed?
Have you ever wanted to scream out
All the feelings in your head?

Have you ever wrote so hard and quick
You make your fingers sting?
Then realised that a thousand poems
Wouldn't change a thing?