Human Bonsai Poem by Persa Corbalokovic

Here I am, cold and dry, barren and uninspired!
The only action I was to do, in a way felt required
Was to kill the cause for which he was so admired.

I smothered it, with own tears, and as it transpired
To have my mind by dreary reasoning hit and fired
To unleash icy winds inside - that all made me tired.

So, the utmost effect, that final one acquired
Of 'our' mission in which we both conspired,
Was to make me a plant – not me - he desired!

What kind of man may wish to shrink such an emotion,
So exquisite and humane, gigantic like an ocean,
To sentence to death that bigger than life devotion?

What kind of sense may wish to shrink my mind
Make me believe it wasn’t love what I did find
Or make me believe that silence is so very kind?

I put it clear I want no mercy or pitiful crumbles,
And it's never me, who belongs with the humbles
Or is afraid to speak out, but instead mumbles.

It seems that he never felt or maybe felt just some
Of the love that makes the strongest mortal dumb.
Maybe of all that beauty he was given but a crumb.

He'd never admit. If a silent friendship is his wish
And he’s ready my every offer for more to blemish,
I will order my heart ALL my feelings to abolish.

Cause he will never, n e v e r feel anything more
Than to 'admit' the obvious or share some bore
As he keeps bringing me to the ever closed door.

Would HE stand in front of any closed door,
Be happy when receiving a rejection of his core
Illusions and values, stand humiliated and sore?

Would HE come with the heart in his hand,
Be so very happy with my discordant demand
H a p p y that I utterly do not understand?

No, of course not! Still he wants me to do it,
In the name of 'our friendship' silence to commit
And though very sane that I call a diamond grit.

How love fizzled into nil no need to be inquired,
Easy to grasp that my mood of being over-inspired,
After I’ve become a human bonsai, simply expired.