I Cant Poem by Audrey O'shea

i cant see thru u, like someone i dont care to know, its making me
question if ur being true, becuz a completely differend side your beginning to

show. i dont want to leave, but im falling back into my depression, its
making me wonder if me u decieve, and its conjuring up my obsession.

to constatnly question everyone around me, even my own life, and its
impossible to see, thru the blade of my knife. i thought u cared, but

once again im in doubt, last night at the phone i stared, wanting to
scream and shout. ive tried to make u happy but right now im not, im

feeling really depressed and my temperatures way too hott. i feel really
disconnected from the world, and myself, what do i keep doing wrong?

as i always stare into nothingness. i cant get ahold of you and its makin
me mad, and your promises are way too empty, and yes yesterday i

was sad, becuz im starting to resent me. i keep asking why and why,
that i go thru this cycle and i try and i try, and in the end theres wetness

in my eyes. the tears are starting to spill, when they've been locked away
for so long, i thought my emptiness would fill, but i find myself taking a

pill, becuz i feel that uncertainty that i dont belong. maybe your not as
perfect as you made yourself out to be, maybe u lied when you said u

loved me, maybe its true that i will never see, whats ahead and whats
behind this relationship between you and me. i really cant judge it at

this point, becuz i still have yet to talk to you, i tried to forget it by smokin
a joint, but it made me think it more thru.