I Confess Poem by Justin Borthick

Sometimes I question if I feel at all
Sometimes I wonder if I acted it all
The feelings and emotions I look back and see
I had at one point, but that isn't me

Sometimes I question if I know what it means
Sometimes I wonder if it's normal to be
Lacking the heart for the ones I know
I love but at some point, it's too hard to show

It's not a numbing, I know how that feels
It started as that, but now it's surreal
The fact that I smile doesn't mean a damn thing
When the fact of the matter is I don't know what it means

To smile, to laugh, to love, to live
I often question what all of it is
It's hard to believe that this is me now
When I see what I'm lacking, to it all I avow

I confess to the fact I lie with my words
While within my heart I know they deserve
Someone that can tell them what they need to hear
But underneath it all, I believe I hold fear