Into Darkness Poem by Colin Cedar Bell

As the dark became my home

I didn’t miss the light

as much as

I missed the shadows


Shadows give us direction

A way to find the light

In the dark there is no direction


Nowhere to go

Nothing to leave behind

Lost in a bit of time

Where time doesn’t move


Not forward - Not backward

Nothing passes - nothing changes

Stuck, not in the eternal now

But the eternal never

Not a wish, denied by time

But a wish, stillborn


A dead heart can’t hurt

It also can’t wish

Pain would give me hope

Like grass breaking stone


It’s not that love has ended

Or love has left me ‘lone

I have lost the faith to feel

that love is real

And the agony I remember

Is nothing that can heal


Don’t light me any candles

For it would hurt my eyes

Don’t tell me any promises

For I would count them lies

Don’t try to be my friend


For friends I have no more

The world where I could love

Has died so long ago

So I make my home in darkness

With my companion called despair


For what I felt and suffered

Was more than I could bear

So let darkness be my blanket

Coldness soothe my burning sore

For never can I be again

Who I was before