Jaded Poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar

Jaded...
By fading consequences
Held onto like treasured jewels.
But I do not sparkle within,
Or radiate a gladness
Shown on the surface...
And polished with pretense!

Jaded...
A product of delusion
Manifested by observation
And a fixed comfort zone.
Transfixed and smothering!
I run to escape...
But no one chases!
I hide to shelter myself,
From myself!

I'm jaded!
Corralled and fenced in
Behind gates I alone can unlock!
I have the keys in my pocket.
If I should open them...
Someone else may find my space,
And free it of complaint!
And that is my biggest fear.

I'm jaded.
With a need to hold onto something real!
Exhausted and left unchallenged.