Jerptious Flort Poem by Rev. Rebecca Guile Hudson

I’m an odd, jerptious flort
Yet you hunt me for sport –
Don’t you know that I am endangered?

Of all the florts left behind,
I’m the one of my kind –
Please, can’t we just be enstrangered?

As a flort, I depend
On non-existent friends
For survival, for water, for food

I am the last one –
My species is gone
And to kill me? Well, that’s simply just rude!

Hey! Look at me!
I’m as weird as can be –
Seven legs, three heads and one eye

Please, let me live,
And please, do forgive
My appalling existence as I

I know you are kind,
So let it pass from your mind,
Killing me so you get applause

I’m a one of a kind,
I’m the last of my kind –
Just let me go due to natural cause