Lost My Chance For Happiness Poem by Vanessa Kurtz

We were friends and then lovers,
My husband never knew.
Us hiding together under the covers,
And he never even had a clue.

He didn’t know when he was away,
We did some work of our own.
We had sex every single day,
And your seed was sown.

I had gotten pregnant,
You were the one that did it.
But about “us” I was silent,
And my conscience was split.

I wanted to be with you,
But I was already married.
You loved me, and I loved you too,
But my feelings remained buried.

December, miscarriage, baby died,
I knew it was because baby shouldn’t have been.
I wanted so bad to commit suicide,
But then I thought of you again.

I couldn’t get myself to take the pills,
I couldn’t pull the trigger on the gun.
I couldn’t forget the chills and thrills,
Of a secret romance that had begun.

Now you’re gone out of my life,
I should have used my mind, my brain,
Divorced him and become your wife,
But I didn’t and here I’ll remain.

Unhappy and treated like dirt,
Missing you, wanting you.
Feeling left behind and hurt,
Knowing there’s nothing I can do.