October Thoughts Poem by Ivona Sophia

enclosed in an orange bottle with a childproof lid,
tiny pills with numbers on both sides.
there wasn't enough time to name them.
life will do them justice. was it worth it or not?
right now is the time to rehearse suicide,
count them on the palm of a hand, wide open.
skip the counting. believing is the most important
in the morning light, another day closer to the
dawn. the feeling of every layer of consciousness
being peeled back, naked to the core,
watching closely how pupils are not changing in
diameter. or maybe it's time for a grand finale
on wrinkled sheets, with a sleepless pillow,
with the orange plastic bottle on the night stand