Oscar Velazquez

Rookie (March 18,1987 / Anaheim, CA (Orange County))

pbDrawing My Lonely Drive/b/p

For you,

I'll draw (in color)
a picture of myself
driving my beat-up car.
All through busy
Tiny City streets
not going very far.

Black zigzag lines
troubling roads.
The yellow tracks
dotted inside, show
where I've been
passed every block (twice) .

Still, my lil-car (color of smoke) runs
rearview showing…déjà vu.

Picture me inside
singing to
sad Spanish songs
(Mexican-ballads) drawn
in broken-notes (blue)
rising from the old radio
(beginning bold)
escaping out open windows
billowing up
(Opacity—fading softly)
into the sky.

My crayola night
in Tiny City ends,
same place
where it begins,
under a
gradient sunset.
Behind a red light—stuck
hoping to find
that road I've never seen
the one
that makes the world seem…big.

Submitted: Tuesday, February 03, 2009
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Comments about this poem (pbDrawing My Lonely Drive/b/p by Oscar Velazquez )

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  • Rookie Greenwolfe 1962 (2/3/2009 5:09:00 PM)

    I thoroughly enjoyed this tale. I didn't expect to, but the writer made it interesting.
    This shows what a good writer can do. I'm not sure about the structure. I would
    like to have seen a more conventional prose structure, but I can forgive that.

    GW62 (Report) Reply

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