Telling the untold story of my childhood
Rewinding the despicable memories that withdraws me from fully happiness
To me when I was a little girl
peace meant war
and joy meant agony, because it came with sacrifices
Rewind..........
Back to the time when I would sell cassava leaves
and pounded maize just to help my family
I wondered where I’d get money to buy medicine
for my beloved mother and late brother as they were diagnosed with tuberculosis
Rewind...........
Back to the time when my dreams were filled with nothing
but dust and less hope
When I’d just sit on porch with bricks unpainted and cracked
just waiting for our landlord to kick my family out of a one roomed shelter
It’s all gone now, but engraved in my heart
Rewind..........
To the time when my sick yet strong mother kept telling me to put a smile
on my face, because all these sufferings aren’t meant for us
“Smile dear, smile. Fill the whole house with laughters.” she’d say
And all I could think of is how to raise on my feet and scream
“Mother, mother stop. we can’t shut out anguish, it’s with us
mother, stop pretending that it is all well.”
The struggle was there, I just wanted to scream, shout, and spit words
that’ll make your blood boil like lava, but then my voice was sucked in by that anguish
You could hear my mother’s heart ache
You could hear it’s theme song
As it sings praises like we were it’s appraisal
Rewind..........
Back to the time when I thought that the heaven has caged in all their blessing
where I thought that the Lord has forsaken his own, I began to deny my salvation
back to the time when instead of tears of joy, like when a barren woman gives birth
falling down my face, tears of pain did
How I wish I could save all those tears that flowed like rivers
so that my distress can drown in them in slow motion
Life isn’t perfect, it’s like an endless movie all about bittersweet
and a little fast to the sweet part could’ve saved lives.
Rewind..........
It’s all gone now. I can’t remember a single thing.
good memories, thanks. I invite you to read my poems and comment.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
Memories can be good or bad sometimes. We have to swallow the bitter pill the same as the sweet pill. They both end up in the same place. They can't be erased just pushed back in the subconscious and gotten back at a later date. If its a rewind let it be a fast one. There is sill hope. A very powerful write.