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Ashley Dowdy (Forbus)

Roads traveled

With the roads we travel, and the lives we lead
We have the power of what we want to be seen
At times you may choose to see what is ugly on the way
However, in the moment of this very day
I choose to be still and take in what is around me
Which is with every road we travel in our lives beautiful scenery is what ought to be seen

Submitted: Sunday, July 01, 2012

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  • Rookie - 61 Points Vipins Puthooran (7/14/2012 2:00:00 AM)

    Two roads are here before us
    One is wide and the other is narrow
    We can choose any one of them
    But it should be leadings us,
    To the promised land! ! ! ! ! !
    A nice poem! ! ! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 125 Points Romeo Della Valle (7/13/2012 10:58:00 PM)

    A short but thought provoking write that I agree with my friend Frank James Ryan Jr, it needs some minor works to it more powerful and catching, otherwise, it is worth reading it! 10+++ Thank you for sharing dear Ashley! Keep inspiring the Poetry World with more of your touching writes! God Bless You! Love and Peace for always! Romeo from New York City! (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 2,278 Points Frank James Ryan Jr...fjr (7/1/2012 1:09:00 AM)

    A commendable display of prosaic verse...If I could be so bold & offer an (IMO) suggestion...Prose like yours above requires meticulous punctuation, so as to enable the Reader to read the work the same way YOU would recite it. You need to employ breakpoints via the use of commas, colons, and perhaps ellipsis(pause dots...)
    It's an easy fix, and it will eradicate any semblence of run-on phrasage & permit your Readers to grasp the full beauty of your prosaic artistry....Good Luck, Ashley ~FjR~ (Report) Reply

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