James Casey

Rookie - 0 Points (11June 1940 / Binghamton, New York)

Sitting Here

Sitting here

I sit in this chair and wonder why
I feel so helpless alone, then try
To sort out my feelings, and my life
Wondering how I caused so much strife

Hurting those that I love the most
Binding them up to my whipping post
Using my words to cut like a knife
I didn't know that this was life

Being hurt and lashing back
I've started down this one way track
The blocks of bitterness begin to grow
Those words of anger, to those I know

Her words are like the cold of winter
I'm not one to ever be the quitter
Now, I'm first, I won't hesitate
To let out bitter words of hate

I'm like a fighter in the ring
Throwing punches that do sting
Knowing that I'll win this round
My burning fury will be unbound

Even though I'll win this fight
Somehow it just doesn't feel right
Once again I am to be the loser
As usual I am always the abuser

Living in silence would be better
Then to living in a place so bitter
I want to end this vicious cycle
But, it all just seems so futile

Is this a real life that I live?
What's left for me to give?
A simple word of gentle kindness
Not just words so full of bitterness

Overlooking this stinging dart
Looking past them to your heart
Seeking for some beauty deep within
My plan is too overlook your sin

I could understand your leaving me
I defiantly will set you free
But to leave the children too?
Because of that sin I bid you adieu

Jim 1985

Submitted: Thursday, December 29, 2011
Edited: Wednesday, April 25, 2012

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Poet's Notes about The Poem

Bitter at my wife for leaving us. So bitter in fact that when she finally decided that she wanted to come back I told her I would rather live alone with my children then with her and the children. This marriage was over. The lawyers and her lies made it appear that I threw her out and had a woman non of which was remotely true

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