To My Mother Poem by Melody Stargaze

This war that has started is because of the past,
For which I was not a part of.
And I know that this hatred will last,
But why hurt me because of it?

I know you hate her, but I do not.
But I do not hate you either.
I love you, and I thought
That you loved me too.

I've done much wrong in my mother's eyes,
And I can't express my shame.
It's myself whom I despise
For doing this to all of us.

I never realized I was such a pain,
I wish I was a good person.
I put up a wall with nothing to gain.
I made myself into a monster.

I wish my mother could love me,
Despite my horrible flaws.
I wish it were the way it used to be.
I wish I didn't disappoint her.

I really do not hate her,
And I don't hate him either.
Is there a way I can show her,
That I really do love them?

And I'm not leaving to get away from here.
I'm going because I'll have the space.
I'll be gone, but I'll still be near
You and I'll see you often.

Sure he and I fight and hurt one another,
But we don't actually mean what we say.
He and I don't actually hate each other,
That's just how we are.

You think I am doing this out of spite,
You think I want to tear you apart.
And I'm trying with all of my might,
To not break your heart.

I want you to understand my point of view,
I want you to realize that I'm just moody.
No mother, I could never hate you.
Even if I act like it sometimes.

You're my mom, the only one I got.
I'm not leaving to hurt you.
Your love, I have not forgotten.
Please don't feel like I have.