Twenty-Four Seven Poem by Hannah Davies

Thank you for being so patient and kind
As I have had a lot on my mind
I think about you twenty-four seven
When you hold me in your arms, it feels like I'm in heaven.

I wish that I coudl tell you all
Of what happened to me when I was small
One minute I'm up, the next I'm down
Not sure whether to smile or frown.

It's far too much to comprehend
There are some things that people can't mend
How I wish things weren't so complicated
And that I didn't feel so much self-hatred.

Trying to forget my troubled past
But can't help thinking my new found happiness won't last
I hate people to see me vulnerable and weak
A loving, gentle hug is all I seek.

I don't mean to push you away
When truth is all I want is for you to stay
How can you honestly want me?
When I'm nothing but damaged and dirty? ?

I like to feel your body close to mine
And for a while I feel safe and fine
But my biggest fear is that when I look you in the eye
THat it's him looking back at me, that makes me want to cry.

I wish all these bad thoughts would just disappear
And that making love didn't fillme with fear
IT's hard to keep the painc at bay
And too many things that are upsetting to say.

SO may things they made me do
Shameful things I was subjected to
I would be beaten black and blue
Told I deserved everything they put me through.

I was such an idiotic fool
To have ever trusted my Mum and Paul
I don't ever want YOU feeling bad
Because it's NEVER you who makes me sad.

I can't expect you to understand
But I'm grateful you want to try and lend me a hand
I know some things to you must have come as a shock
But you have been a wonderful, supportive rock.

I thought I may have scared you away
And I realise that still may happen one day
It feels so right when we're together
That just an hour apart feels like it lasts forever.

YOu have helped to put me a little more at ease
I hope that you won't hurt me PLEASE!
Love is one thing I thought never again would I find
But twenty-four seven, you're ALWAYS on my mind! !