You Thought I Was Strong! Poem by Emma Jane Rae

You thought i was strong,
but im not, i'm weak,
you called me 'trappy'
but now i find it hard to speak,
because i just can't find the words to describe,
this feeling of emptyness,
im carrying inside,
i don't believe that on minute you here,
and the next your gone,
how can that be right,
when it feels so wrong?
why was it you, they took so quick?
why does life have to be such a bitch?
im holding in the hurt,
that im trying to hide,
but theres no way of escaping,
when theres many more tears to be cried,
i've got so many questions,
the answeres i'll never find,
why does life have to be so unkind?
the saying goes 'time heals pain'
so why is time standing still again?
i fee like my chest is being ripped apart,
and the gap is one that will never be filled,
because i'm mouring for my best mate,
who on july 31st got killed,
you always made me laugh,
and you made me smile,
i can't believe this news - im still in denial,
i feel blessed to have been a part of your life,
remember when you told people i was your wife?
you said theres no sex and i winge like mad,
not hearing you talk,
makes me so sad,
how can i live without you there?
i hope you knew how much i cared!
and if you don't i'll tell you know,
it will be cheesey,
but i'd shout it out loud!
theres a thin line between love and hate,
and i really loved you fella,
couldn't have wished for a better,
best mate! ! !