Ahmad Shiddiqi

Rookie (March 7,1974 / Semarang, Central Java, Indonesia)

A Diary Five (La Isla Mambo) Poem by Ahmad Shiddiqi


(dedicated to Ms. Lynda Robson, a poet friend at poemhunter)

by my love-longing for you only
is your heart not softened?
I am a wild tiger
a hunted one

longing like downward swoop of an eagle
for angels and mermaids make your love
the mouth of Summer dew is a rosebud
like the advance of flames in sunlight

like sweetness of honey plunged into our soul
am I truly considered as your darling angel?
I have found my future in your bed of roses
nevertheless you run to seek your destiny

Submitted: Friday, February 13, 2009

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Comments about this poem (A Diary Five (La Isla Mambo) by Ahmad Shiddiqi )

  • Rookie Aldo Kraas (8/8/2010 7:35:00 AM)

    I like that you wrote a poem for Lynda Robson. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Mario Rios Pinot (9/17/2009 11:30:00 AM)

    A Diary Five (La Isla Mambo)

    (dedicated to Ms. Lynda Robson, a poet friend at poemhunter)

    by my love-longing for you only
    is your heart not softened?
    I am a wild tiger
    a hunted one

    longing like downward swoop of an eagle
    for angels and mermaids make your love
    the mouth of Summer dew is a rosebud
    like the advance of flames in sunlight

    like sweetness of honey plunged into our soul
    am I truly considered as your darling angel?
    I have found my future in your bed of roses
    nevertheless you run to seek your destiny

    Ahmad Shiddiqi

    I love this poem. I could not find the ine that you suggested, I might be doing something wrong. What is La Isla Mambo? Like the dance? Spanish adds extra spice? A wild tiger a hunted one is pretty good. Nice image. The 'advance of flames in sunlight' is really good. I use the word 'like' as little as possible, simile, I just do the metaphore thing. So it would not be like the advance...but it would be...advance of flames. Clear, crisp, unhindered, no camparison. Honey plunged into your soul...wow, sweetness, nice but then a contrast...the plunge, almost forced. Please Ahmad let me know what you think. (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 30,190 Points Mehta Hasmukh Amathalal (9/16/2009 11:54:00 PM)

    I have found my future in your bed of roses
    nevertheless you run to seek your destiny
    yes despite all she should hve choice for destiny and us explosre it.....10

    read mine si must go....come home... no separate ways (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Akram Awadat (5/30/2009 2:44:00 PM)

    nice poem, well done (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 39 Points Malini Kadir (5/18/2009 3:15:00 PM)

    last four lines are superb! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 77 Points Surya . (5/15/2009 8:50:00 AM)

    beautifull poem, nice wordings.posted 10
    surya (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 40 Points Ashraful Musaddeq (4/25/2009 6:15:00 AM)

    Lovely (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Gargi Saha (2/24/2009 2:17:00 PM)

    A wonderful poem..........10++++++
    Love & hugs. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Ben Gieske (2/20/2009 4:38:00 PM)

    Makes for an exiting read with all the vivid images and action words. Nicely done. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Maria Barbara Korynt (2/18/2009 8:41:00 PM)

    Your poem is as full of emotions as the love poem. You are also charming readers with words. It is 'heated writing' :) I like it. They pleasantly are reading and nice written. :) (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Hannah Russell (2/18/2009 7:45:00 PM)

    This is very good can u read some of mine i think i need a little work on some of them anyone will do (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 5,618 Points Lorraine Margueritte Gasrel Black (2/18/2009 4:35:00 PM)

    Is this the impossible love your heart longs for? A ten from me. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 15 Points Rajaram Ramachandran (2/18/2009 7:15:00 AM)

    Very nice to read the diary five. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Anthony Foster (2/16/2009 3:45:00 PM)

    You have a silver tongue, very discriptive. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 26 Points Fiona Davidson (2/16/2009 5:18:00 AM)

    Lovely dedication to a lovely lady...thanks for sharing it...10++ (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Lynda Robson (2/16/2009 4:36:00 AM)

    Thank you so much for this exquisite poem Ahmad, you are a gentleman and a good poet and friend, I am honoured,
    10
    Lynda xx (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 1 Points C.R. Clark (2/14/2009 10:10:00 PM)

    A nice write and tribute, Ahmad. I like your imagery.
    Richard (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 69 Points Sathyanarayana M V S (2/14/2009 9:33:00 AM)

    Beautiful poem for a beautiful poet (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 269 Points Seema Chowdhury (2/14/2009 8:36:00 AM)

    very nice poem forr a nice friend (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 395 Points Ency Bearis (2/14/2009 6:13:00 AM)

    nice write and dedication to Lynda Robson.. (Report) Reply

Read all 27 comments »

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