A Funny Christmas Poem Poem by greg paul

(A Funny Christmas Poem)

Twas the night before Christmas, santa was throwing a hissy
Mrs. Claus was laughing at him, and calling him a sissy
He was putting on make up, and dressed like a queen
It was a midlife crisis, like no woman has ever seen

He was powdering up rudolph, mascara for his eyes
A hoof over his face, to hide the aweful disguise
All the other reindeer, they laughed at rudolph`s complexion
They said your flying alone, and pointed in the southern direction

The elfs hid from santa, their toys were half composed
They locked the bathroom door, for fear of being exposed
Jack frost wouldnt visit, frosty went south for the winter
The little drummer boy hide behind a fence, and got a splinter

Scrooge was laughing hard, and asked santa why the fancy
He replied he read a book, about a dragqueen named Nancy
I wanted a new look, for all the good boys and girls to see
Its ok to be different, when your opening gifts by the tree

This world is a changing, and we must accept what is said
Mrs Claus said if you keep it up, you`ll be sleeping in the sled
She closed the door, and left santa standing in the snow
His new outfit was freezing, and he had no place to go

All his friends disowned him, and his family gave him an option
Either come to your senses, or be put up for adoption
Morning came Mrs Clause woke to such a clatter
She went down stairs, to see what was the matter

Jolly as can be, santa stood tall with his sack
Rudolph was normal, and exclaimed that he`s back
I`m sorry dear santa, you definitely was a sight
They said Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night

© Gregory Paul 12/23/2019