John Carter Brown

A Hole In My Sock

I've noticed, again, a small hole in my sock
And there's something I don't understand:
It puzzles me greatly, I'm baffled, and so
On this subject I now should expand.

I put the sock onto my left foot and see
That peeping out there's my big-toe;
This makes me unhappy, because I am sure
That left there, the small hole it must grow.

To effect a solution is easy enough,
So I swap the sock o'er to my right,
Then the known laws of physics get twisted around,
I begin to lose trust in my sight.

I cannot believe what I see on my foot
It seems that the hole has reversed;
It's moved to the left - to my other big-toe!
I now think my sock has been cursed.

I swap the sock back, and the hole moves again,
It's creepy - what does it intend?
It's back to the right, where it was in verse two,
I now think I've gone round the bend.

And so I surrender, it's all got too much
Sock-holes move, and of that there's no doubt;
I just wanted to warn you about it, and thought,
Like the toe, that I'd just point it out.

(Written Aug 2013)

Submitted: Saturday, August 24, 2013
Edited: Monday, August 26, 2013

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Poet's Notes about The Poem

I think I need some new socks.

Comments about this poem (A Hole In My Sock by John Carter Brown )

  • Gold Star - 6,894 Points Bri Edwards (2/6/2015 9:06:00 PM)

    John, you've inspired me!

    THANKS, BY THE WAY, FOR THE TIP ON SOCK HOLES! bri :) thanks for sharing. goes to MyPoemList.

    p.s. here is the result of your inspirational poem.

    - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -


    I jumped in the pool. I wore my Speedo;
    I thought my jewels were secured.
    To be modest is my virtuous credo,
    though, my swimsuit, some have demurred.

    Ten laps later I got out to off-dry,
    intending to sit ….in poolside lounge chair,
    but then an errant ball I did spy,
    sticking out of a hole …. with some hair.

    Yes! My left gonad was all uncovered;
    I wrapped the towel ‘round and went to loo.
    Had anyone else, my errant ball, discovered?
    I checked to be sure that I still had two.

    Two were there I found, to my great relief;
    that one had gone wandering made me laugh.
    I turned suit inside out. Problem solved, my belief.
    Hole was now on right, and right ball was bigger by half.

    Yes! When I was born the doctor said to my dear Dad:
    “Your boy’s right gonad is huge; 50% more than the right! ”
    My Mom was almost too tired to care, but she was glad ….
    that I had the normal number of what’s-usually-out-of-sight.

    Well, I was correct. My right gonad stayed within the Speedo,
    though a bit of it was showing through the silly hole.
    I returned to the pool, bending a little my above credo.
    I never had thought my rightie would come in handy, bless my soul!

    (February 6, 2015)

    i shall submit this as my next PH poem and give you some credit. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Connie Yost (5/4/2014 9:21:00 AM)

    Just thought I would reiterate, - -I love this poem! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 118 Points Yash Shinde (4/12/2014 1:21:00 PM)

    .......people should learn from you, how to turn everyday incidents into stocks of humor.............lovely write (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Connie Yost (3/15/2014 9:06:00 PM)

    As I read this my smile just kept getting bigger and bigger - -I love it! . (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,489 Points Howard 'the motivational poet' Simon (2/25/2014 12:47:00 PM)

    A nice laugh to brighten one's day. Well done my friend! (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,203 Points Kanniappan Kanniappan (12/19/2013 8:27:00 PM)

    The poem is nice and funny. To a poet, anything can be a subject for making a poem including 'socks'. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 68 Points Susy Evelyne (10/24/2013 2:33:00 PM)

    This is a 5-star poem (or 10/10) . It passes the laughter test and the punchline is brill. (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,958 Points Smoky Hoss (9/15/2013 11:23:00 AM)

    Great story, rhyming and telling, very fun to read this one. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 299 Points Adeline Foster (9/10/2013 4:39:00 PM)

    Enjoyed this one. Read mine - Briar Fever -
    Adeline (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,561 Points Noreen Carden (9/3/2013 1:42:00 PM)

    Hi John very funny made me smile
    well done (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 312 Points Ruth Walters (8/29/2013 3:10:00 PM)

    .......and point it out you did :) What I want to know is how socks are lost in washing machines and are never seen again? Is there some black hole, some cavernous pit within the machine that sucks them in? Do they end up in 'sock alley' or down 'sock it to me hill'? ? ? ? ? ? Where are all the odd socks? : o))))) I know not still. Beam me up Socky, tee hee (Report) Reply

  • Silver Star - 3,183 Points Valerie Dohren (8/25/2013 9:09:00 AM)

    Very funny write John - can't say I have experienced this problem myself though, and yes I definitely think you should buy some new ones. (Report) Reply

  • Silver Star - 3,405 Points Diane Hine (8/24/2013 8:04:00 PM)

    This phenomenon has confounded physicists for years. I find the best solution is to sew the hole up while it's still on my foot because if I take it off I know I'll forget to do it.
    An entertaining poem! (Report) Reply

  • Freshman - 655 Points Mary Forrester (8/24/2013 12:13:00 PM)

    Great poem John and very funny. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Ozark Mountain Homegrown (8/24/2013 11:34:00 AM)

    haha! I enjoyed this very much! Funny and witty...made me smile from start to finish.. (Report) Reply

Read all 15 comments »

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