Ben Gieske

A Mouse (Haiku) - Poem by Ben Gieske

moon shadow
the little gray mouse
edges toward the cheese

placed 5th in the December 2007 Shiki Monthly Kukai (free format)

Comments about A Mouse (Haiku) by Ben Gieske

  • Gold Star - 18,460 Points Ramesh Rai (10/17/2014 11:28:00 PM)

    This reflects the natural phenomenon of life. Nice. (Report) Reply

    0 person liked.
    0 person did not like.
  • Rookie - 3 Points Dr Hitesh Sheth (3/14/2009 12:04:00 PM)

    In wintry night
    cat catch the crying mice
    is it tears or dew...............
    Good write........ (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 5,729 Points Lorraine Margueritte Gasrel Black (2/4/2009 5:20:00 PM)

    Ben,5th place? -your haiku should have been in first place! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! a ten from me... (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 8 Points Anjali Sinha (1/13/2009 10:08:00 AM)

    wow a lovely haiku mouse edging to cheese
    -10 anjali
    (read mine too haikus of love) (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 270 Points Kesav Easwaran (10/30/2008 9:10:00 AM)

    nice one..a 'koo'ing image on the moon and the cloudy spread...10 (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Estrella Baldemosa (6/29/2008 7:03:00 PM)

    a good haiku...poet is not self -absorbed and discrete from the object, a real haiku... (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 2 Points Chris Mendros (5/25/2008 6:03:00 PM)

    This is as good a 'ku as i've seen on here. What else is there in the mouse's world, but that cheese?
    Watch out for the- (SMACK!) ... (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Duncan Wyllie (5/25/2008 4:24:00 PM)


    Thanks Ben

    Love duncan X (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Eithne Queen of Celts (4/19/2008 12:45:00 AM)

    It's the goal of every haiku, that of expressing a whole universe in a few short lines.I love this one.It made me feel in the shoes of the little mouse.There is no one to stop me from getting what i want (the cheese) .But is it moral, is it right to get the cheese? (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 1,458 Points Francis Duggan (1/6/2008 10:52:00 PM)

    A beautiful haiku this one Ben well done (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 145 Points Nimal Dunuhinga (12/28/2007 10:50:00 PM)

    Oh! What a beautiful poem? This resembles me Takuboku.Ishikawa. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Rachel Flint (12/28/2007 12:38:00 PM)


  • Rookie Alison Cassidy (12/25/2007 7:01:00 PM)

    A delicate poem in exquisite taste... love, Allie xxxx (Report) Reply

Read all 13 comments »

Read this poem in other languages

This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.

I would like to translate this poem »

word flags

What do you think this poem is about?

Poem Submitted: Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Poem Edited: Tuesday, May 3, 2011

[Hata Bildir]