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I thought I could stay away
But I just couldn't bare it anymore
It was calling my name so I had to
I know I gave in
But I can't be strong
I never was and never will be
I knew it this strength wouldn't last
I'm weak as weak can be
I saw the knife one to many times
I tried to hold myself back
But I couldn't
And it felt good to see marks on me once again
To feel the pain
To feel alive
But now I want more and more its my addiction
I tried to kill it but it wouldn't die
It had me trapped and I couldn't get out
Suicide is no longer on my wish list
But I still feel alone
I still have this pain it lingers me
I wish I didn't have it
And I wish pain didn't exist
But it does and it hit me
I thought I could be happy
But I should know better than that
Cause pain follows me everywhere I go
And cutting is my addiction
I admit it now I want to do it more and more
Just to see the scars to feel alive
Sometimes addictions come and go
And I thought this one was gone
But it came back at my front door
And now its back to stay
Cutting is mine for always
Its an addiction and its hard to break
December 10,2007
ESPN CHICK
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10.0
/10
(3 votes) |
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Click here to write your comments about this poem (Addiction by ESPN CHICK)
Lisa Benningfield (10/11/2008 10:17:00 PM)
I can't imagine anyone wanting to hurt themselves to feel alive, you would think that everytime they wanted to do that to themselves that they would stop and listen to thier heartbeats in a very quiet place and take in very deep and short breaths and say hey I'm alive what else can I do besides what I am doing. I lost my little sister 3 years ago, she is no longer doing drugs, and she is at peace, but I know for a fact that that is not how she wanted to stop! I wish there were one big cure for all addictions. |
James Timothy Jarrett (10/4/2008 9:51:00 PM)
So sad. Hope writing has found peace for you or life has. Short cut, value it, I find insulting. (Previous comment) Wonderful poem |
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