Damian Cranney

Rookie - 75 Points (27/09/1949 / Liverpool)

Date With A Vampire


There once was a vampire quite fat,
Who was partial to fricassee of rat?
He liked to drink blood, but rat he did favour,
It really was quite peculiar behaviour.

But Vladimir had more problems than that,
He no longer could turn himself, into a bat,
He still had the need to hang upside down,
So would stand on his head, in a dressing gown.

He went on a date with a zombie, of late,
Who though recently deceased, he really did rate,
It was going quite well, till they got up to dance,
When, Zelda the Zombie went into a trance.

She was still for a moment but started to shake,
And then parts of her body began to break,
Her arms fell off first and then her head,
But the loss of her legs stopped the evening dead.

Vladimir kept his composure quite well,
He was disappointed of course but you couldn’t tell,
He picked her up gently, and sent her home in a cab,
He has a date with her next week, at Frankfurters Lab.

Submitted: Wednesday, May 14, 2014
Edited: Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Topic of this poem: humour


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Comments about this poem (Date With A Vampire by Damian Cranney )

  • Rookie - 37 Points Colleen Courtney (5/14/2014 1:36:00 PM)

    Love this dark and humorous write! Well done! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 194 Points Anand Brown (5/14/2014 5:20:00 AM)

    Check the spelling for brake, should be break. BUT other than that, i loved this poem. The blending of two social misfits renders an alternative to the perceived notions. I loved how you rounded each line off with an effective rhyme that actually added meaning and developed the ideas presented in the poem. The poem in itself is quite funny, but it has a stronger more serious message behind that should not be forgotten. Excellent poem :) (Report) Reply

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