Dear Mr. Saggy Pants
Now if you knew me well you would know,
I would watch anything but a fashion show.
I am definitely not at all into Haute Couture,
I never could understand the great allure.
I never subscribed to Vogue, Fashion, or Elle.
Nor to Marie Claire, InStyle, and Mademoiselle.
And although you might find it rather bizarre,
You'd never catch me reading Harper's Bazaar.
So when it comes to the latest fashion trends,
You are better off asking some of my friends.
And maybe if I had myself some deeper pockets,
I would shop in places other than marts and outlets.
But as it stands, my greatest shopping accomplishment,
Is finding clothes I can wear on sale or on consignment.
Yet even I, with my limited knowledge and sense of fashion,
Cannot offer guys with saggy pants any form of compassion.
To me, seeing their underwear high above their pants waist,
Is not a sign of revolution and free expression; just bad taste.
And although it started in prison and was first worn by some Rapper,
Trust me guys you look far from cool, fly, phat, badass, or dapper.
So come on, do yourself and your sweet honey a big huge favor,
Pull up them pants, tighten that belt, and hide your underwear for later.
(c) 2013 copyright Elena Plotkin
Elena Plotkin's Other Poems
Read this poem in other languages
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
Comments about this poem (Dear Mr. Saggy Pants by Elena Plotkin )
(March 26, 1874 – January 29, 1963)
(27 October 1914 – 9 November 1953)
(4 April 1928 - 28 May 2014)
(16 August 1920 – 9 March 1994)
(12 July 1904 – 23 September 1973)
(28 November 1757 – 12 August 1827)
Edgar Allan Poe
(19 January 1809 - 7 October 1849)
(10 December 1830 – 15 May 1886)
(1 February 1902 – 22 May 1967)
(30 December 1865 – 18 January 1936)
- If, Rudyard Kipling
- The Road Not Taken, Robert Frost
- Still I Rise, Maya Angelou
- Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night, Dylan Thomas
- Invictus, William Ernest Henley
- Annabel Lee, Edgar Allan Poe
- No Man Is An Island, John Donne
- Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening, Robert Frost
- To an Athlete Dying Young, Alfred Edward Housman
- If You Forget Me, Pablo Neruda
Poem of the Day
- Let It Be on Monday, God, Donal Mahoney
- Rain, Devin Lasker
- Lyrics Lifted Aloft, Saiom Shriver
- Who Are They?, Gbolagade Taiwo
- Broken Marriage, Donal Mahoney
- New York City, Dawson Walter Smith
- I will turn my eyes from you, Nero CaroZiv
- In Concert Tonight, Donal Mahoney
- January 1st,2015, MOHAMMAD SKATI
- In My Dreams, Kyle Schlicher