Death Of My Childhood Poem by Julie Neises

Drugs, weapons and speeding cars
litter my broken brain.
My head begins to ache and pulse
not holding up to the strain.

I need someone to help me now,
I'm almost through today.
I want someone to show me
a better less painful way.

The street lights
cast off and erie glow.
And I remember the times
I should have said no.

Few friends remain
my faults to blame.
Viewed only in selfish haste,
how could I not feel the shame?

My heart continues
the only motion it's ever known.
It's growing weak and there's no way
it will survive to be full grown.

These feelings can't be normal,
there must be something wrong.
My tears are never ending
creating rivers long.

Why can't I stop this feeling
of self-loathing and of doubt?
Or is there just a way
I haven't heard about?

My childhood is gone
leaving scars that will remain.
I'm not sure if I'll make it
through the endless pain.