David McLansky

Freshman - 747 Points (5/24/1944 / New York City)

Dracula's Family Life, An Intimate Picture

Grim of eye,
Sharp of tooth,
Dead he lies,
Eternal youth.

His third wife,
Who he met one night
On Channuka,
Whisper hoarsely,
'Vlad, get up!
I put fresh blood
In your cup.'

Vlad, just groaned
Turned to his right,
'It is still day,
It's not yet night,
Just let me sleep
A little longer.
We'll make love
When I am

'It's not for me,
You sexless cad,
And I thought once
You were so bad.
There's someone
Knocking on the door.
Don't go back to sleep!
Don't you snore.'

Vlad closed his eyes,
Snuggled in his coffin,
With such a young wife,
He didn't get to sleep too often.
But his wife complained
And so he rose,
And stood before
The mirror posed.

'How do I look?
Oh nagging wife;
To think that I gave you
Eternal Life!
I must have been completely out of my mind!
Or terribly thirsty at the time.
I know, I know,
'Get the door, '
Latvian women
Are such a chore,
I should have chose
That Polish bride,
But they're too salty,
Ham on rye! '

'Vlad, I didn't mean
To scold,
But your fresh blood
Is getting cold;
And maybe later,
If you're free,
We could play
Beat the Bat
Like we did at Disney.'

Dracula reflected
Looked round the room,
He saw no cobwebs,
In the gloom,
You've been cleaning again!
Spread some dust,
I'll count to ten! '

Veronica grabbed the broom
And pushed some dust
Around the room,
'You should have married
That Polish tramp,
I bet she likes it
Foul and damp..
Oh really must you
Be such a bore.
I know, I know,
Get the door.'

Submitted: Thursday, March 27, 2014
Edited: Thursday, March 27, 2014

Topic of this poem: love

Do you like this poem?
0 person liked.
0 person did not like.


Read this poem in other languages

This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.

I would like to translate this poem »

word flags

What do you think this poem is about?

Comments about this poem (Dracula's Family Life, An Intimate Picture by David McLansky )

Read all 1 comments »

Famous Poems

  1. Phenomenal Woman
    Maya Angelou
  2. Still I Rise
    Maya Angelou
  3. The Road Not Taken
    Robert Frost
  4. If You Forget Me
    Pablo Neruda
  5. Dreams
    Langston Hughes
  6. Annabel Lee
    Edgar Allan Poe
  7. Caged Bird
    Maya Angelou
  8. If
    Rudyard Kipling
  9. Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening
    Robert Frost
  10. A Dream Within A Dream
    Edgar Allan Poe
Trending Poets
Trending Poems
  1. Dreams, Langston Hughes
  2. Still I Rise, Maya Angelou
  3. The Road Not Taken, Robert Frost
  4. If You Forget Me, Pablo Neruda
  5. Phenomenal Woman, Maya Angelou
  6. Daffodils, William Wordsworth
  7. A Dream Within A Dream, Edgar Allan Poe
  8. If, Rudyard Kipling
  9. Caged Bird, Maya Angelou
  10. Fire and Ice, Robert Frost
[Hata Bildir]