Anthony Burge (16/06/1962 / Australia)
Fade To Black
The family’s away and so goes my sun.
I sit on my own in the dark it’s no fun.
Its real dark in here, as dark as squid ink.
The darkness leaks in to the thoughts that I think.
The faded washing swings off the line.
I look at the clock and breathe in synch with the time.
The garbage bin has begun to stink.
Have to climb over dishes to get to the sink.
I wonder how long I could go without eating.
This dark veil's heavy I hope it’s just fleeting.
A mountain of washing to be conquered awaits.
I leave the door open, so to with the gates.
Walk away to the edge, alone with my dog.
Killing me softly my minds full of fog.
I stand in the wash looking out toward sea.
Wishing I could dissolve into her as one be.
Unsuccessful I trudge in my footprints reversed.
From the shore to the door for a life well rehearsed.
Down with the sun up with the birds.
On paper I continue to wrestle my words.
Walk the halls after dark and bounce off the walls.
Take the good with the bad take the scrapes with the falls.
Cleaned my cold gun feel the weight of dark steel.
Look down the barrel wonder how would it feel.
Made my bed now lie in it I watch geckos hunt.
Wait for sleep to grip me and to the dark shunt.
Unable to sleep I stare into the dark.
Doing battle with my demons I fight the black shark.
Till standing in the dark breathless searching for light
All normal folk are already tucked in for the night.
So I sit on the bed edge and look into the lens.
Don’t like what I see give the glass a quick cleanse.
Look again it’s now clearer and worse than I thought.
It’s my real time reflection the mirror has caught.
Turn away from my image; close my eyes, held my breath.
Mourning my youth hollow tears now bereft.
Thick black darkness floods into one of life’s little corners.
This must be the place that the happy ones warn us.
Swim towards the light at the end of the tunnel.
Follow the voices that call through the funnel.
I won’t try to fly, hang on not to rope.
I’ll shed this dark cape, seek the light I can cope.
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