Ashley Davis

(10/27/91 / Dallas, tx)

Good Girl

I'm a good girl
Smiling, laughing, making jokes
Looking at the glass as half full
Painting a nice picture...
But never really showing I'm hurting
Never showing my day-to-day worries
Being told you need to do this
Being told you need to do that
Never being asked what I want
When I am asked
I never seem to know what to say...

Not wanting all the attention
But wanting some...
Feeling wronged by the past
But not sure who to blame...or what...
Sharing my feelings to only one person
But not wanting them to worry
So I hesitate to ask
Or to explain my reasons...

I am a teen but not feel as one
Missing out but not really caring...
Lying to hide my true feelings
Only because i am afraid
Afraid they will think I'm weird...
Think there is something wrong with me
Causing me to question every thought I have...
Always asking myself if I am normal?
What is normal?
Have people felt like me?
I have many doubts...
But do not express them
Not sure if I should say something...anything?

I lost a lot and I have gained some things too
I have made my peace with people
Although I was not in the wrong...
What do I do now?

I am a good girl
Smiling, laughing, making jokes
But you only see what i want you to
Scared to show anythings else...
I am lost and have yet to find my way
Someday i hope to have the answers i seek
Someday I will find what I am looking for
As to when that someday comes...
I can only wait and see...

Submitted: Monday, March 02, 2009

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