Is There Life After Love (After Lie) ? Poem by Amanda Saveley

Is there a life after love?
Can there be love after lies?
My entire delusion
Fed by your illusions
How could you let me believe something so?
How could I let myself...
Throw something so...precious...
Away...
Not knowing everything? !
Not knowing what you 'failed' to tell me...
For WHAT?
For WHAT? !
So I wouldn't think less of you?
I didn't lie, ya know...
I wouldn't have thought less of you knowing the truth
But now...
Knowing that SHE
not me...
Was the first,
Regardless of whether it was good or bad
As if knowing that I was a 'good lay'
would actually make me feel BETTER!
How could you let a lie like this slip past your lips
Such a monosyllabic, simple...
God, is there a Hell? This must be it...
LIE

To say I was crushed is so little a thing
And I took it with more grace than I knew how to muster
I was good in drama, you know...
I can mask my voice better than my face
Why do you think I wanted you to tell me over the phone?
To save me some SLEEP? !
Ninja, please.
To say you know me so well, and yet so little
You're not the only one who can lie, you know...
And I can't even bring myself to hate you.
Logic won't let it be so
But the moment my heart gets the upper hand...

And you had everyone fooled,
Everyone through me
Who thought you were so IDEAL
An image of perfection...
Oh, how foolish we've all been.

Who knew.

It's time to be a big girl now...
Don't cry.

I never wish for such bad things, but I don't wish you well...