Learning About Love Poem by Kyra Carr

When will I learn to forget?
It is so hard to just move on.
Your memory's etched in my head.
Even when forgetting seems so close,
you find your way into my dreams.

Even though I take precautions
to avoid the places we shared,
they haunt me; Painful reminders
of the closeness and fake smiles.

Every step I take seems inane.
I fall back farther than before.
The cuts, the scrapes, and bruises
awaken me to my mistakes.

Every step is painful to me.
Shards of my lonely broken heart
leave behind smeared, bloody footsteps,
blemished by my clouded intensions

All of the things I could have said
hang in stillness, a midnight fog.
I beat myself up constantly
for the pain I caused you to bear.

In breaking your beautiful heart,
I shattered what was left of mine.

While you move on and fix your own,
I will sit in perfect silence,
endure my suffering alone.

I can not moan, can not complain.
For this I have myself to blame.

I'm learning slowly about life:
through failure and mass confusion,
through earning trust and losing it,
sharing love and taking it back.

I never claimed to be perfect.
I can never compete with you,
never be worthy of your love.

One day, when looking back on this
none of the pain will still linger.

It will serve as a reminder:
of the good, the bad, the better,
the things I should have never done,
the times I will never forget,
most of all, the sound of your laugh.

When it no longer hurts so bad,
it will teach my heart a fondness
that few will ever get to see;
Couples in love will surely know,
That feeling when you know you're loved.

But that time can not come fast enough

When I look back on what we had,
I'll only be able to smile

No matter how I toss it,
You're the best I have ever had.