Scar Tissue Poem by Kate Austin

I really like this this is my favorite line 'being angry is easy but happy is hard' its really true and something i need to think about.

I like this poem. And not only because it is the type of poetry I enjoy reading and writing; but for the great use of 'death' imagery. My only negative critique for this poem is in response to Stanza 4: 'lakes of black and oceans of red the second is blood; the first is dread' In my honest opinion, you do not need the second line of this Stanza. We can gather this information from the use of the words 'black' and 'red'. You might want to re-read this part of the poem. Um... If you do not mind, I thought I might also include a little edit I did up for you (if you do not mind) . EDIT: Blackened dreams and sorry hearts; Murdered doves slowly falling apart - Thoughts swirling in their lying eyes; Splintered hopes and family ties. Scar tissue builds up and suffocates, Not a shred left, of what was once grace. Being angry is easy; being happy is hard; There are lively trees in the ground, but dead leaves in the yard. Your good intentions were edged with glass; Time will heal, but time doesn't pass. People suffer, and people die; - A limb for a limb, like an eye for an eye. No one is real, and everyone is fake; - God can give, and God can take I collect dust and grime along the way; Hoping for a break, from this pain someday. Simple breakdown of what I did: I added some punctuation to the poem because I felt that this is a poem that should be read aloud. The punctuation will help create natural pauses and build up a somewhat tense atmosphere within the poem. It should also give the poem a more morbid and eerie mood too; which suits this poem perfectly. Also, I have tried to keep it as simple as I could. I noticed the rhyming scheme (and I hope I did not throw the rhyming scheme out either) , so I could not simplify everything in the poem. But that is just my own thoughts on how you could change/improve the poem. In conclusion, a great read and a great piece of writing. I hope you do not mind my lengthy critique. Keep up the great work!

simply beautiful and poignant...................

I like it. Good job