Strenuous Flu's Poem by Percy Dovetonsils

They're coming at America
from every direction,
the strenuous flu's.

Why else
would the millionaire
floosies
of Malibu
become sweaters and strainers
with personal trainers
than an attack
of a strenuous flu?

Why else
would the anonymous soldiers
of Homeland Security
attack peaceful protesters
in Lafayette Square
than that their brains were confused
by a strenuous flu?

Why else
would police officers
all over the
flyover states
empty their weapons
into the backs
of fleeing, innocent,
black
citizens?

Why else
would our Attorney General
go to war
against the very law
he's supposed to enforce
but that his brains
and heart
have been ignited
by outlaw strains
of the strenuous flu?

Why else would our President
choose to downplay
every day
the covid pandemic
to the American people
rather than warning us
against it?

Yes, Dear Leader himself
is in the grip
of a strenuous flu,
it twists and distorts
everything he do.

What's light
and white
to you
is dark
as night
to a captain
with the strenuous
flu.

Just at the moments
of crisis
when he should be
taking the helm
to save
the Ship of State
from the yawning gulf,
the strenuous flu
makes him a slave
to golf.

Sad but true,
his brain
hashad
an especially strenuous
strain
of the strenuous flu
since infancy.

It's driven him to engineer
bankruptcy after bankruptcy,
to tell 20,000 lies,
to grab pussies
and embrace brutal autocrats,
give tax cuts
to aristocrats,
to undermine the EPA
and the Department of Education,
to cage children,
to toss paper towels
to Puerto Ricans
when they needed
real rescue,
to tell Californians
to sweep leaves
while their whole state
burns through.

It's driven the man
to do
everything he can
tosabotage
the coming election,
which he knows
he's going to lose,
unless he's saved
by especially strenuous
flu's.