Charles Hancock


The 12 Days of As-Seen-On-TV Christmas Poem by Charles Hancock


On the 1st day of Christmas I gave my true love
A Mr. T Chia Pet
Something she said she won't forget

On the 2nd day of Christmas I gave my true love
A Wraptastic
What she had to say was bombastic

On the 3rd day of Christmas I gave my true love
The Incredible...Flex-Able Hose
She turned the color of an old rose

On the 4th day of Christmas I gave my true love
A set of Ruggies Rug Grippers
She was so happy she ran with scissors

On the 5th day Christmas I gave my true love
A Side Socket with Surge Protection
You should have seen her expression

On the 6th day of Christmas I gave my true love
A Bacon Wave
She mumbled something about a galley slave

On the 7th day of Christmas I gave my true love
The 'Ove' Glove
She exclaimed she was undeserving of

On the 8th day of Christmas I gave my true love
A Topsy Turvy Tomato Tree
She screamed like a banshee

On the 9th day of Christmas I gave my true love
A No! No!
She nearly drank a bottle of Bordeaux

On the 10th day of Christmas I gave my true love
The Brazil Butt Lift
Well, I thought it was a great gift

On the 11th day of Christmas I gave my true love
A pocket fisherman
She slowly walked to the trash can

On the 12th day of Christmas I gave my true love
Truck nuts made of chrome
This is the end of my poem

Submitted: Wednesday, December 18, 2013
Edited: Thursday, December 19, 2013

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