The Gaping 'whole' Poem by Robert Burgan

Wake up in the morning and I'm jumping from a ledge
The bottom seems far but it's closer than I thought
Instead of making an attempt to find the missing link I sync
With demons every time I think I've found someone to make me breathe
The isolation has me pacing floors made of devastation
Narration in my head steers me into conversation
I can taste sensation on my tongue but my gums are numb
Ablation, take my heart from my chest before it drowns in blood
Somewhat of a manic trip I become the analyst
Seeing every friend I make slipping through my fingertips
My downfall is distance, affection is inanimate
Sitting on the mountain top, imagining abandonment
I give you one hundred percent of my desire
An angel in your eyes got me singing with the choir
Little ball of fire I'd die upon your pyre
My word stained teeth its time I apply the plyers
Require your assistance but you can't be my provider
The gaping whole soul keeps getting wider
Co-dependent, taciturn, humbled by the lack of words
Your hair in the breeze forms wind to make my passion burn
Just another storm let the rain pour
Poor me, poor me, sitting in my brainstorm
I cannot connect I'm deaf, fail to hear the extent
Sitting in my truth talking to my cigarette
Common sense tells me 'learn when to stop'
Loneliness floods my head with one single raindrop
The rest is history, cyclical epiphany
I know I need you
You don't seem to need me

Jekyll in my Hyde, heckled by my own pencil
You project the good life I resemble the death blow
Tremolo, I'm the arpeggio
Ascend, descend, breaststroke through the death throes
So sentimental wrap my arms around your meaning
You give me a response and I smother you with clingy
I hope one day you see me for who I'm not
Malaprop stops when I'm propped up on your plot
No more confusion I deserve the seclusion
Every euphoric feeling I end up abusing
Your muse is my music you're effigy is empathy
You're everything to me I'll rely on every memory
Melancholic melodies echo in my malady
Recipe for disaster, formula for insanity
Formulate rapport until the experiment goes sour
Flasks boil over and the monster devours
My mask is intact dressed up and empowered
Don't respond to my act I revert back to a coward
What am I supposed to with idle time
When my idols are mirages and my god is in your eyes?
Your eyes are closed I exposed my explosion
Scared of the truth you promised devotion
You held up your end you are brighter than a sunspot
I need to accept I can't have exactly what I want
The gaping whole grows I get small enough to hide
I pinpoint trends then relive them every time
I cherish every second we spent in this segment of life
Best chapter
Seems like the perfect ending.