The Year Of The No Reindeer Flu Returns Poem by Jim Yerman

WELCOME TO DECEMBER…
If it's December it's time for the return of this annual tradition
This tradition can either be passed on from year to year or…
you can pass on it…
the choice is yours.



THE YEAR OF THE NO REINDEER FLU…

From the city of No in the south of Japan…
came a flue bug…but it didn't cause the flu in one man…
or one woman for that matter…No, the virus that year
only caused flu symptoms in Santa's reindeer.

Two weeks before Christmas that bug went on a roll
and soared up the coast straight to the North Pole.
The reindeer's eyes watered and their noses…they blew
for this was the year of the No Reindeer Flu.

"Santa! " Cried Mrs. Claus, "what are we to do?
All of our reindeer have come down with the flu.
Rudolph's nose is all stuffy, it is not shining red,
he and the others are all sick in their beds.

They're too ill to get up, and their fevers are high,
they're cold and their achy…why, they'll never fly.
They can't help you on Christmas Eve…not this sickly old group.
They'll be resting and drinking my hot chicken soup.

It's a cinch you can't pull the big sleigh by yourself.
So what will you do…my once jolly old elf? "
Santa thought for a moment, then said, "Send out the word
this year Santa's looking for an entire new herd! "

"Tell all the world's animals, " and Santa started to beam,
"tomorrow we pick a new sleigh pulling team.
Tell them we need help on this one Christmas Day.
Tell them the reindeer are sick…and to bring resumes."

As the news spread all over the world on that day
many animals came…you could't keep them away.
When they heard Santa's in trouble, they all caught a ride
To the North Pole they came…from far…and from wide.

There were tigers from Burma and llamas from Peru
There were yaks from Nepal and goats and cows too.
They came by the hundreds. They came every which way
just for the chance to pulls Santa's sleigh.

Santa interviewed every animal who came
no matter how big, how little…how wild or tame.
and after screening and searching the entire collection
Santa was ready to make his selection.

"The choice wasn't easy…everyone was so great,
but as you all know…I can only pick eight.
So will the following animals please wander up here.
You'll be subbing tonight for my ailing reindeer.

Salama from Africa…I'm proud to declare
you're one elephant I can't wait to see fly through the air.
And Erik the moose from the land of Norway
I believe you have some experience pulling a sleigh.

Barakah the polar bear from off in the distance
tonight of all nights I could use your assistance.
And Jake from Australia, that's right, the red kangaroo
come on up, and by all means, bring your didgeridoo.

Isabella the rhea…now please don't you cry
I just think it's about time you learned how to fly.
Next, Buford, the buffalo, from out on the plains…
thank you for coming, we can sure use your brains.

And Priscilla, the penguin, you already know how to fly.
you soar under the ocean, now let's try the sky.
Lu Si, the panda, from China…yes…you.
I've alerted the elves to find some bamboo.

There you have it my friends! I think we are through.
I have made my selection of Santa's new crew.
Shout out the good news from every rooftop and basement…
Santa has found himself eight reindeer replacements."

Then Santa turned to the crowd that had gathered around,
He raised up his hand…and they quieted down.
As the cold of the North wind showed up on his cheeks
He smiled and nodded…then started to speak.

He thanked them for coming…he shook every hoof
and when he was finished…he jumped on the roof.
"Thank you again, " he said as it started to snow.
"I will always be grateful…and now you must go."

"For their isn't much time…why I can't believe
How can it already…be Christmas Eve?
There's so little time and there's so much to do
We've got eight animals to get ready…and toys to pack too."

Then remembering the animals assembled about
He didn't want them to feel bad…to be sad…or to pout.
So he winked at the elves and his beard he did stroke…
Then he turned to the animals and once again spoke.

"To thank you for coming, the least we can do
Is to make your trip home…fun and easy for you."
Then the snow began sparkling as it fell from the sky
and all of the animals started to fly.

"Thank you my friends." He said to the hovering pack.
To show you my gratefulness…you may all now fly back.
You came from as far off as China and Rome
the least I can do is to help you fly home."

The animals cheered and they laughed and as the snow fell they cried.
They soared and they dove…and some learned how to glide.
The sky at the North Pole came alive on that day
as thousands of animals all flew away.

Everyone waved, watching the animals depart
Then the head elf, named Ava, turned with a start.
"Santa, " she said in a voice frightened and loud,
"But who'll light the way through the fog and the clouds? "

"Rudolph's so sick, and his nose light is low…
Just then the sky around Santa's head started to glow.
"Meet Sparky the firefly." Santa said with a grin.
"And if his light's not bright enough…he brought all of his kin! "

"Santa, " Ava asked as they both turned around
and looked at their team and the sleigh on the ground.
"Do you think they can do it? How will the sleigh run?
In the history of Christmas…it has never been done! "

Santa thought for a moment then looked over his brood
"It's time to get ready, better get them some food.
And Ava, don't worry, you have nothing to fear
I was once asked the same question about eight tiny reindeer."

"We'll put Erik and Salama at the front of the squad,
followed by Buford and Jake." Santa said with a nod.
"Lu Si and Barakah will be next on the tether.
with the last spots reserved for our two birds of a feather.

"We may not look normal; we may look bizarre…
as we head off to the heavens and fly through the stars.
Why I'm not even sure the whole thing will fly
but I know that when night falls I can't wait to try.

"So let's get to work. There is no time to lose.
These animals all need to be ready…to cruise.
There's so much to do and the time's getting tight
I'll meet you all back here at the first sign of night."

The elves took the animals to the VIP stables
Where they ate and were pampered…Hey! They even had cable!
They were measured and brushed and dressed all in red.
They were readied for Santa and led to his sled.

They walked tall to their harnesses and as they were connected
they all stood at attention as Santa inspected.
He touched each animal's face and patted their heads,
"I can't thank you enough." was all that he said.

Then he entered his sleigh as the wind started to blow
and he lifted the reins and asked, "Are we ready to go? "
Each animal nodded without looking back.
Santa ran through his checklist and rechecked his sack.

As snowflakes again sparkled down in the dark
Santa unlocked the brake and nudged the sleigh out of park.
The sleigh started shaking as it moved up and down
and in no time at all was ten feet off the ground.

Then Santa remembered as he squinted to see
he'd brought along Sparky and his whole family.
As the fireflies flew around each animals head.
"Light ‘em up Sparky! " Santa smiled and said.

In an instant the fireflies started to glow
And with the checklist complete they were ready to go.
For the first time in history on that Christmas Eve night
Santa's sleigh was equipped with eight tiny headlights.

"Merry Christmas to all! " He yelled from his sleigh
As they soared to the stars and were well on their way.
"We'll see you at first light with the dawn of the sun
When our sack is all empty and our mission is done.

So this Christmas Eve if you see high in the sky
A moose or a penguin and a sleigh that can fly
with a polar bear, panda and a kangaroo too
It means all of the reindeer have come down with the flu.

Just be thankful for animals…Oh…and for jolly Saint Nick…
who will still bring you Christmas…
when the reindeer are sick.



THE END