This Is The Last Smile, That I Will Fake For The Sake Of Being With You Poem by Matthew Boisjolie

Life is strange. How it puts you down. Up and down. Flips you around, and make you sit mesmerized by the elements that are below. The heat of stress causes you to calapse. Stared at by your own mistakes. Give everything and make a sacrifise to try and advance. Make good with others. And when you get them close they walk away. Throw up a block on their emotions to make you hurt. And they never see what they are doing. How they are influencing. They keep on with the fake emotions they throw forward. They don't understand how they affect. They say they don't understand why we hurt. Why we long, why we cry. And they just try to take the best part of you and prolong it in darkness. Try to take the individuality and turn it into social reform. I want something else. I want to take all the negitive energy and banish it in a locked box. Take those poeple and push them away. Make them GO AWAY. Yet they come back to hurt more. TO take more and more of your heart till you are close to dieing and continplating how to take it. Listening to all the lies. thinking SHUT UP. yet never saying those words. Becuase we love to much. We want it. It's all a dream. Of today, yesterday and tomorrow. Pulling me close to make me distant. All becuase i was with you and didn't want to let you go. All this pain. All this hurt. All this bull. All this is promised by your fate. By your actions. And still bing haunted by you in my thoughts, in my dreams, in my emotions, and most of all in my heart. Never once did you help me. Just bring me down and laugh at me when i fell. It's all true. Your destiny is calling and your running. Why can't i let you go. And tomorrow brings the same ordeal. Every day seems like it's inching by like a freight train. Blocking my vision from life. From your true face. From your true intention. Intentions to bring me down when you don't think you are. And it's all inside. All just fate making you act out in this action. And i just followed you. I don't hate you. And im not your toy. Yet that's all you long. Just someone to pull out of your closet and toy with. Keeping all true emotions inside. And this all comes in my year, my month, my day, and yet all so clear for me to walk. To forget, to start over. And you give it away, to have someone new, to be happy to forget me. My life, my emotions like i was nothing. You never even slammed the door in my face. All with all my instincts sensing pain, im lost within myself. Drawn into a cage and starved. Yeah this is the last smile, ill fake for the sake of being with you.! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! 'Greatly influenced by Linkin Park' 'Why is it so blinded to see reality'