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Fae Sebastian

Rookie (3/17/97 / Virginia)


It's in your eyes when you look at me
It's in your voice, your very movements
But I promise I'm okay
Even when I'm not
And I swear I'm not crying
Even when I am
Because I don't deserve your worry
I don't deserve your comfort
Even as you spill it all over me
It just makes me feel worse than before
Because you're always there for me
Even though sometimes I'm not there for you
And I hate it because you should hate me
Not say I'm sorry, I'm there for you, you're wonderful
Because I should say that to you
Because I'm not wonderful, not really
I can be cruel, cold, insensitive
I can't talk when I should and I always can when I shouldn't
And you're too kind and too forgiving and too you
And I hate it because I'm not
I hate it because I should be
Because I'm scared
Because I don't want to admit that
Because you care
Because you always ask what's wrong
Because I worry you, so much
And also because...
You're too trusting
Too giving, too kind, too all I'm not
You laugh when you shouldn't and make others laugh too
You never seem sad, always happy
Never say when something is wrong
And it worries me.

Submitted: Saturday, June 23, 2012

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Poet's Notes about The Poem

Written for two of my best friends.

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