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Asif Andalib

Rookie (27 November 1967 / Moez Monzil, Komlapur, Faridpur, Bangladesh)

A lonely man's monologue


So many false hopes like the stars of a moonless night
Show me the way to survive in this dreary life
I bury so many dreams like a grave digger
And give birth to new ones like a queen bee

My heart has broken into so many pieces
It has become the sands of a desert
My sighs have become super storms
My tears have become the clouds of rainy season
My smiles have become the lightning
And my laughter has become the thunderbolts

My days have become months
And my nights have become years
My poems have lost rhyme like the hot summer days
My songs losing all softness have become hard rock

Submitted: Sunday, November 18, 2012

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  • Rookie Sinjin Tyger (2/13/2013 8:00:00 PM)

    Today was a day of false hopes for me too. My heart is so shattered as well. I liked the epic perspectives of this poem. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 251 Points Louis Borgo (1/7/2013 5:14:00 PM)

    i notice a lot of d's and b's and m's and it caught my eye on the I bury so many dreams like a grave digger
    And give birth to new ones like a queen bee a sound that bee would make this one for me is my favorite from you
    great job. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Kevin Halls (11/21/2012 7:21:00 AM)

    It has been mentioned before when a poet writes a dark or sombre poem that he or she may be depressed.
    But I find that to be neither here nor there, what matters surely is the response a poem gets, not the poets state of mind? I enjoyed reading this poem, and I don't feel depressed! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 63 Points John Raubenheimer (11/20/2012 5:23:00 AM)

    Asif this is the best poem of yours that I have read. You're not trying to force any of the lines. Your imagery is exciting. I can't fault your English (not that I would want to - if English is not the language of your birth, I can't imagine how difficult using it must be.) I am impressed. It's so difficult to respond honestly to poems. You don't want to break anyone's heart. But in this case responding is a pleasure. Thank you so much. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 11 Points Chandra Thiagarajan (11/19/2012 9:18:00 AM)

    The monologue of the lonely man is soul stirring.The presentation strikes at the root of the heart.Well written. (Report) Reply

  • Silver Star - 9,854 Points Valsa George (11/19/2012 8:20:00 AM)

    I am sure you are not a depressed person! A poet can be very objective most of the time! He deals with all sorts of themes, hardly related to his life! Nevertheless, this is a very poignant write! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Greg Uhan (11/19/2012 8:14:00 AM)

    a great write...we acquire our strength in this life enduring hardship...this poem captures the beauty at the heart of our struggles. (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 2,905 Points Bri Edwards (11/18/2012 11:19:00 PM)

    i really wonder sometimes if a poem is an honest/true portrayal of the poet's life. OR has the poet made up a very believable story which is not true? i wonder what is the case with this poem. most of my poems are true portrayals of me or things around me, but my 'halloween approaches' poem and my soon-to-be submitted 6 Foot 3 poem are not really ME or real happenings. one reader of halloween thought it was scary and asked me to write another one. so i did. thanks for sharing. by the way, one person commenting below assumes that there is a woman behind your poem. not necessarily true! maybe not a man either.
    bri edwards my poems are now listed alphabetically by subject(s) , not titles. well not exactly. look for the two i mentioned under Scary. (Report) Reply

  • Veteran Poet - 2,905 Points Bri Edwards (11/18/2012 11:08:00 PM)

    asif, i almost always use rhymes BUT i didn't even notice the lack of them in your poem until you mentioned it!
    i especially liked the visions of grave digger and queen bee and sands of the desert and the last stanza in its entirety. thanks a lot for sharing.
    today i added categories at the beginning of each of my titles to make it easier for readers to decide want to look at. bri (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Nader Baheri (11/18/2012 2:34:00 PM)

    nice Asif.and terrific.
    and the romance changes to horror.and the poems to the novels.and the smiles to the grimace.love it ~nb (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 38 Points Alex Sarich (11/18/2012 1:10:00 PM)

    You sad man you, for being in an emotional situation. Dont allow it to hinder your progress in writing, you have great skill in writing. thanks for sharing. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Sukkum Chang (11/18/2012 12:09:00 PM)

    ohh dear..you write really well sir, i m touched by your poem..thank you for sharing us this wonderful poem and its 10 plus ratings.. (Report) Reply

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