I had a form to fill the other day
Which, when completed, could be said to be
An outline of my life. How carefully
I edited the story to portray
Apparent purpose, shaping facts so they
Would inter-lock and leave no hint of the
Long stretches, haunted by uncertainty,
That came between. Although I shouldn't say
So, when completed, I was qute impressed;
I seemed a person I'd be pleased to know.
Until I realised it was the rest -
The many failures that I didn't show,
The doubts and longings that I'd not confessed -
That, in the wilderness, had made me grow.
This is a very heartfelt piece Mary. You breath life into the mundane so well.
'Between the lines' is a poem, you could create a series from....it is a very matured poem with a compelling message of the many faces of people! !
How gripping and moving this tale is. Needless to say, our lives mirror that tale within. Loved it
However its structure..........this is a magnificent composition!
The content and message of this piece leave nothing to be desired, and the language is very natural. But using 'the' as a rhyme word and the line break ('although I shouldn't say / so') rather let it down. I haven't read all your PH works yet, but do you do anything else but sonnets? Perhaps there is a case here for writing this poem in a different form.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
I love the wise end to this friendly sonnet!