Enjoying My Fags Poem by Alessandra Liverani

I really do enjoy my fags I really, really do
The one when I wake up in the morning and the one when I'm on the loo
Each and every one has that special, divine taste
Even the ones which are two hurried puffs and the rest of the fag goes to waste

The feeling as my lungs fill with noxious fumes is something I just can't describe
It makes me feel so relaxed and at peace, impervious to anyone's jibe
It's not that I must have a smoke, no it isn't that at all
It's just that I enjoy them so much, I have myself such a ball

Whenever I ring someone up I light a cigarette as well
How on earth else could you make a phone call? God, it would just be hell
When driving in crazy traffic, a cigarette is a must
It relaxes me so wonderfully, other drivers eat my dust

I don't get withdrawal pangs, no I smoke because I choose
And why shouldn't I continue, what have I got to lose?
Sure, they cost a bit of cash but they are worth every cent
They give to me so much, I'd hate it if they went

It's said they're bad for your health, who cares about that anyway?
Lungs? I don't need to breathe but cigarettes I must have everyday
I'm sure that I've convinced you that fags are wonderful things
In fact I'm lighting one now that must be the phone which rings

(Sydney, Australia - 2003)