I Knew Your Name Poem by Jade Leven

I wanted to comfort you and hold you in my arms
I was constantly held captive by your unknowing charm
but now I understand how your mind and heart work
and I realized you're something our pain isn't worth

it always hurt me to know that I was nothing special to you
it would hurt you to know that I gathered that little detail
I was not blinded, I was in denial of your hold on me
and I was always willing to forgive if good intentions should fail

and so very often they failed

you helped me to see what I am not
and for you, I did the same
I told you I loved you every chance I got
and at least I can say I knew your name

it still takes me to a different place, far away from here
when I see you I can hear you singing with me to erase the fear
but I touch your face and you slip away, you were never real
you were only what I wanted to see, to make me feel how I longed to feel

you'll never know how you made me feel

you led me to fear my own heart
and you let me take all the blame
I thought nothing could ever tear this apart
well at least I can say I knew your name

I'm not just letting you slip away
I'm pushing you as hard as I can
I'll always love you in this version of eternity
I'll always be tracing the palm of your hand

at least I can say I knew you better than I knew myself
I knew your name