Manonton Dalan

Rookie - 300 Points (virginia, usa)

I Remember - Poem by Manonton Dalan

street lights are still lit up
as she fills my coffee cup
with same greeting everyday
"how's your mom doing today? "
with a simple grin and "okay, "
she hands me bagle and jelly

pinching coins from my pocket
dropping a quarter on the carpet
i lean back to see where it lands
rub my back on somebody's hands
"excuse me, may i help you please? "
i turn around my lips is on her face

i blush, i feel my heart pounds
i touch her arm; whisper sorry
she waves her hand; smiles at me
yes, i give a last quick look at her
she's so pretty i could remember


Comments about I Remember by Manonton Dalan

  • Gold Star - 30,191 Points Roseann Shawiak (4/5/2015 12:54:00 AM)

    A tender and gentle poem, almost timid, made me smile within. Felt like I was sitting and watching the whole scene while it was happening. Great poem, thank you. RoseAnn (Report) Reply

    0 person liked.
    0 person did not like.
  • Rookie ..... W@king Up..... (6/22/2013 12:56:00 AM)

    So beautiful, so beautiful :) a damn good poem. Great work! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 3 Points Shouvik Roy (6/24/2012 3:44:00 AM)

    wonderful, brought a smile on my face.. (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 7,720 Points Neela Nath (6/23/2012 9:56:00 PM)

    Wonderful verse Described in such a manner as if it is happening before our eyes..Congrats! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 10 Points Demontray Lockhart (6/22/2012 10:43:00 PM)

    This is beautifully composed. Great verses! The first stanza is a beautiful opening to a well written poem. Please view and comment on my latest poem: Cycle: Order & Acceptance. From poet to poet, thanks for the encouragement! (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 8 Points Besa Dede (6/22/2012 10:25:00 AM)

    Natural flow of thought! Beautiful verses!
    ~Besa (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 415 Points Captain Cur (6/22/2012 7:27:00 AM)

    Nicely written remembrance poem.
    capturing a most captivating moment.
    Good work. I liked it. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Ashley Ormon (10/12/2008 2:24:00 PM)

    Very interesting to read.10. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Isabella Swan (9/16/2008 6:43:00 PM)

    u no this captures so much♥ (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 40 Points Ashraful Musaddeq (9/7/2008 2:20:00 PM)

    'yes, i give a last quick look at her
    she’s so pretty i could remember' so natural, so beautiful. (Report) Reply

Read all 10 comments »



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Poem Submitted: Saturday, August 9, 2008

Poem Edited: Monday, June 18, 2012


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