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User Rating:
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9.7
/10
(7 votes)
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In the mystical dark despair
Tight lips in a frozen prayer
Upset for what happened unfair
I saw her in a state rare
'What's the problem? ' I urged to share
She screamed ‘it's none of your affair'
In the moment beyond compare
I tried to unfold the hidden layer
'He broke my heart' she did stare
I want to die, but does he care?
He looks so peaceful lying there
But doesn't realize my pain bare
I said 'living here is a difficult dare'
But, committing suicide is a selfish fare
Love and happiness are seldom in pair
No one gets everything in life, beware
Deependra Kumar Jha
| Submitted Date |
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Tuesday, September 08, 2009 |
| Submitted Date |
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Tuesday, September 08, 2009 |
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Comments about this poem (Love, life and death
by
Deependra Kumar Jha
) |
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Kesav Easwaran (9/23/2009 1:02:00 AM)
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very good practical advice Deepen...well composed poem...you maintain the rythm through out...10
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Bob Blackwell (9/12/2009 4:58:00 AM)
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Life is a journey we all have to follow, at times the path is easy, but it can get very difficult as well. How we deal with the difficulties is the test life gives to us. If we overcome them the path can get easier still. Your friends act was selfish, but compassion must be shown for his deep unhappiness. A well written poem keep it up.
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Deborah Cromer (9/10/2009 10:12:00 AM)
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Nice choices of words to rhyme. You were able to choose the right words to rhyme and still convey your message. Well written out. Pretty tricky to do and you did a very nice job. DC
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Clara Odelia Ciutara (9/10/2009 12:24:00 AM)
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a nice poem to be shared, i like the last part: No one gets everything in life, . makes me have a new look at this life. th
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Chitra - (9/10/2009 12:11:00 AM)
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Life's philosophy...well captured through poetic expressions, resonant in tone
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Lynn Glover (9/9/2009 2:34:00 PM)
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A very good rhythmetic poem, with good structure and flow. I enjoyed the read and congratulations on a good write. Lynn
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Seema Chowdhury (9/9/2009 9:06:00 AM)
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very nice and meaning ful poem. thanks for sharing.
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Karin Anderson (sorry can't vote or comment) . (9/9/2009 8:52:00 AM)
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I too enjoy the way you work with a conversation in this poem. Life is often a difficult road to tread and it is well defined in your poem. Great work1 10 love Karin
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19
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