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User Rating:
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10.0
/10
(4 votes)
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inhaling the ocean breeze and feeling it empty my lungs makes me feel completely intact
i can taste the salt in its entirety on my tongue and i try to scrape it all off with my front teeth
i feel the waves roaring over my heart, liberating it from veins and its arteries, the sea filling the orifices of my organs
the shores stones crowd at my toes and break my skin, but i am cleansed
i stride into the water and it seeps into my nostrils and my intellect becomes infiltrated by the sea, my lungs are suffocated by the wet
and i am completely intact
chloe young
| Submitted Date |
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Monday, June 15, 2009 |
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Comments about this poem (Ocean
by
chloe young
) |
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Nagourta (10/10/2009 2:04:00 AM)
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This one was very pleasant. Well... I found it pleasant, I suppose that is a bit more accurate... Thank you so much for sharing this piece with the world, I appreciate it.: -)
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Shannon Doherty (7/25/2009 1:37:00 PM)
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wow! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
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Kale Beaudry (7/7/2009 1:18:00 AM)
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I loved this one... extremely well written, your comparison and allusion to the ocean creates a wild visual that compliments your message of becoming yourself with every taste, touch, smell, and thought. You are the ocean, Chloe, keep flowing.
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Sameer Ahmed (6/29/2009 7:03:00 AM)
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Wonderful imagery portrayed with beautiful words. The freshness
of the experience you had can be imagined with calmness over-
-whelming......10/10
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Sulaiman Mohd Yusof (6/17/2009 1:26:00 PM)
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Oh cHLOE, I love the imagery you had depicted.It soaked deep into my veins and will remain there for a long long time.Great writes dear!
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Betty Doyle (6/17/2009 10:01:00 AM)
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This poem created such beautiful, vivid images
Perfect
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Travis Lepine (6/16/2009 10:27:00 PM)
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Wow... what a poem!
I had such vivid images in my head as I read it and it gave me such a peaceful feelings as I read it.
...I hope that the poem is based on your home land of Ireland because I; m going to Dublin this month and I hope its as beautiful as your poem. Thanks
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Dans Only (6/15/2009 6:51:00 PM)
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I really like this. There's room for improvement, but not much. Wonderful write. Loved the topic.
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Read all
9
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